slip-sliding away…..

I want to go home.

Away from the bustle.
Away from the world;
the competitiveness,
the cars,
the companies,
the selling,
the promotions and offers.

The music and advertising,
the suffocating headlines
plastered on every lamp post –
an industry publicising
only the worst of the world:
trials, evictions, the energy crisis, corruption, murder, rape, inflation, threats, war.

A world which sleeps,
oblivious to the reality of the Hereafter,
so consumed in itself;
so self-involved and obsessed
with its own doings.

Religious conflicts,
sects,
versions of Islam;
rules, fatwas, opinions.
Extremists, ‘moderates’, liberals,
atheists, the indifferent, and those who are blind –
blind in heart,
doomed forever,
unless saved
by the Mercy of He who put us here.

Even without the ills of the day,
I still wouldn’t choose this world.

For something in me longs
for my true home….Paradise:
not the pleasures, and not the ease,
but the Freedom:
Freedom from material attachment,
and such needs.

Freedom from the misguided masses,
and consumer culture so pervasive.

Freedom from my own faults,
which hurt me and others;
my own lack of strength
to withstand the pressure
when times get tough.

Freedom from challenges,
confrontations,
worries and doubts…

No doubts.
No fears.
No obsessions.
No worries.

Freedom to exist in the natural state
in which I was created,
before the impurity of this world
touched my fragile soul.

I yearn to go back to my Creator,
pure and innocent,
overflowing love and adoration,
and being accepted and taken care of
in the Paradise He made for us.

But my presence on Earth dictates
that there’s a long journey before that –
if indeed I get there at all.

There are trials in this life,
and in the grave,
and on the Day we all are forced
to see the Truth…willing or not.

There are multitudes of wrongs I’ve done,
sins accumulated
both before and after I emerged
from the darkness of my past.

But there are good deeds, too;
and worship which –
though imperfect –
I hope is accepted.

And there’s a sensitive, scared little boy
inside me
who now lives as an adult,
though he always felt
he was too fragile for this world.

But all that – bad and good – aside;
I yearn to be,
permanently,
with my Lord in a state of true submission and eternal peace.

For a lasting feeling of security,
as He holds me
and lets nothing bother or harm me.

As His Love is all I see, hear, taste,
and feel all around me –
pure and free from any worldly stains.

I long for Him,
to be where I belong,
forever in the presence of my One and Only.

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Taken from my still-upcoming anthology. If you would like to take an early look – in return for your feedback – leave a comment.